— People are looking to bury tradition and find new ways to be dead

By Jo Printz

Hayley West wants to become compost when she dies.

But if that’s not an option, she’s happy to be cremated and scattered somewhere in the bush around Castlemaine, central Victoria.

“By the time I die, [I hope] human composting will be happening in Australia,” Ms West said.

“Somebody I know and love will pick up my soily cremains and go and plant then somewhere.”

She said 70 per cent of Australians get cremated as people move away from traditional burials, but an increasingly wide array of post-death options await, in part due to a growing willingness for people to talk about death.

You may not be able to become human compost yet but perhaps you would like your ashes turned into jewellery or a paperweight. Or maybe you’d like a tree planted in your name.

The options are as endless as death itself.

New ways to be dead

Ms West is a Castlemaine artist who presents a weekly radio show about death called Dead Air.

She also hosts semi-regular “death cafes” — a worldwide phenomenon where people get together “to eat cake, drink tea and discuss death”, as the website puts it.

“Fifteen years ago I was considered just morbid and kind of odd for talking about this,” she said.

“It’s evolved and a really interesting space to be in now.

“I have the only live radio show in Australia that actually talks about [death] and I love the idea that somebody could just tune in, hear something interesting and then go away and tell someone else in the community about it.”

Ms West said that in the past five years, she’s noticed more people thinking differently about what to do with their body after they die, including making a minimal impact on the environment.

“People often get scattered [as ashes] in memorable places rather than being interred in cemeteries or there’s now even the option of natural burial,” she said.

How to become a diamond

Heathcote-based author Amanda Collins is “a death doula” who helps people navigate their end.

She says she has also noticed that, over the past decade or so, the rules around funerals and memorials have gone out the window in “a very good way”.

“I’ve seen ashes turned into diamonds, or the slightly less expensive option of being placed in glass paperweights and jewellery,” she said.

And while there are still cultures in Australia that have a strong tradition of visiting the cemetery to clean up the grave of a loved one and bring flowers, a growing number of people are looking for alternatives.

“We no longer follow rituals just because it’s always been done like that,” Ms Collins said.

“There’s a wonderful artist in Melbourne who will take clothing from your loved one and shred that clothing, which sounds drastic, then weave a new garment or blanket or something you have in your house as a memento.”

Filling the dead air

Central Victorian sisters Caitlin Epps and Bec Gallagher co-host The Loss Mothers podcast, guiding women through open discussion about the loss of their children.

The podcasts, or private recordings for those who don’t want their session made public, can act as a “modern day time capsule” and provide a neutral space for people who might be struggling to describe their grief to family and friends.

“They want to continue their memories — to be able to talk about their loved one freely, and not forget about them.”

The sisters have also created conversation cards people can use to open those channels of communication.

“It can be a great way to start a conversation,” she said.

“The more we talk about these things the more it becomes normalised.”

A continuing conversation

Ms Collins, in her role as a death doula, advises people to keep revisiting their death and funeral plans.

She suggests Dying to Know Day on August 8 as a great reminder to revise plans each year.

“I wrote a funeral plan when I was in my early 30s and I’m now in my 50s,” Ms Collins said.

“[Initially] I set out a lot of directions and told everybody exactly what I wanted and I don’t want that anymore.”

For now, she’s just on the lookout for good, appropriate funeral songs.

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