Woven coffins and affordable funerals as community-run funeral service breathes new life into the death trade

Funeral director Ashleigh Martin with woven casket available at Tender Funerals.

By Sarah Moss

Creative and emotionally healthy funerals are making waves in communities that value personal choices, resourcefulness and good old wholesome naturalness, but for reasons of expense they also appeal to blue collar workers.

A rejuvenated fire station in Port Kembla, cradled between the Illawarra region’s industrial centre and the sea, is home to Tender Funerals: the first not-for-profit funeral service in Australia.

Ashleigh Martin is a part-time director at the parlour.

“We’re about empowering families to make the choices they need to make to have a beautiful funeral,” she said.

“There’s definitely a need in our community for people to be able to have affordable funerals that are authentic.”

Since its inception in 2016, the community-run organisation has guided over 300 families and loved ones through their losses.

The parlour offers a multitude of services that assist people to have memorable personalised ceremonies, the latest trend in the industry is bio-degradable woven wicker coffins, handmade in the Byron Shire.

The funeral parlour in Port Kembla has up-cycled an old firestation turning it into a morgue and reception area, open to the public.

Dignity in death

The not-for-profit is changing the way communities look at death and dying, empowering families to make the choices they need to make, to have a beautiful funeral.

Founder Jenny Briscoe-Hough previously worked in the death industry for

Tender Funerals is the brainchild of director and general manager Jenny Briscoe-Hough.

many years and conceived a new business model by combining funerals with music and art.

The model looks at affordability and encourages people to “own” the experience, to take back their power in the face of death.

“We empower and guide people to have a meaningful, beautiful, send off,” Ms Martin said.

Malika Elizabeth is a local musician whose involvement with the establishment extends to directing and singing in the organisation’s community choir, and acting occasionally as a celebrant.

“She’s a visionary when it comes to community and bringing people together,” Ms Elizabeth said.

“She’s created a space for people just to be with each other, to be with their emotions, and to join together in commonality.”

The hand-woven willow coffins produced in the Byron region are, “sustainably raised from a renewable resource and then hand woven without glues or metals”.

Grassroots ethos

Unlike wooden or cardboard caskets, the woven caskets offered at Tender Funerals are perfect for hand-decorating with ribbons and other personalised items.

“They [clients] just want something unique and different that they can personalise as well by putting flowers on it or weaving through it,” Ms Martin said.

“We know if it is getting buried that it will break down quickly and won’t leach any harmful chemicals into the earth.”

After working in traditional for-profit homes, Ms Martin said that at Tender Funerals it is not about upselling to grieving families.

“It’s very much about thinking about what we can do differently and what we can do to give meaningful tokens back to our families,” she said.

Textile artist Ms Elliot works with cloth and thread assisting people experiencing grief to create vibrant engaging artefacts.

Art for health’s sake

The grassroots ethos is intertwined through every detail of the business, from the handmade and decorated wicker caskets to a fortnightly community sewing circle run by the group.

Tender’s artist-in-residence Michell Elliot illuminates the cyclical nature of life and death with those in grief using muslin and donated funeral flowers.

The colourful cloth she creates is then used as shrouds for bodies, encouraging creative expression to farewell loved ones.

“I think that if clients choose to shroud somebody with one of our tender cloths that it’s done with love, and I think that’s a really beautiful thing,” Ms Martin said.

Ms Elliot also assists in providing a safe space program at the parlour for people to come together, grieve, share stories and sew.

The parlour facilitates a safe meditative space created through the arts for people to connect with their emotions to heal.

“When people feel that maybe they don’t want to see their loved ones being prepared for burial, or they don’t know what to do, how to feel, just sitting and sewing quietly allows those feelings to come, to be processed and to shift and move,” Ms Elliot said.

Music, art and funerals naturally go together

The organisation is also home to an in-house choir.

On Thursday evenings at the old fire station, people come together to sing songs of life, songs of death and songs of love.

Tender Choir facilitators Malika Elizabeth and Jodi Phillis (pictured) believe that bringing sacred ceremony into funerals, that are not necessarily religious, is a good idea.

Choir directors Jodi Phillis and Malika Elizabeth have sung at grave sides, in memorial services and during intimate preparation times.

They said they feel honoured to be at every funeral they attend.

“These elements go together naturally with us because we are musical people, but I think in a community like Port Kembla, where people just aren’t aware that this stuff can actually be available to them, it might be something people just don’t think of,” Ms Phillis said.

“That they can have live music to celebrate the life of the loved one they lost.

According to Ms Phillis the business model adopted by Tender Funerals relies on two fundamental aspects.

“One, to bring the sacred power of music and art into the community, especially for people who aren’t religious but still want to celebrate the life of the deceased,” she said.

“The other really strong element is supporting the arts.”

Selecting the soundtrack for a particular event can be a collaborative experience.

“Generally, families will have an idea of what music will be best for their loved one, but sometimes we make suggestions,” Ms Phillis said.

“It’s kind of whatever works really.”

Malika Elizabeth in consultation with some of the choir members in rehearsal.

“We all have the feeling that music is a spiritual thing,” Ms Phillis said.

“It comes out of us, it’s linked with the heavens, it’s what fills in the gap in the air.

“If anything is going to reach our loved one, it’s going to be music.”

At this point in time Tender’s business model is focussed on the Port Kembla premises, but having survived two years of operations, their success indicates a community movement towards an organic, not-for-profit model, with plans to expand.

Complete Article HERE!

Etiquette and FAQ for choosing flowers for a funeral

A funeral is an important yet highly emotional event that every family has to experience in their lifetime. It is imperative for all members of the family to make sure that just like any other important day of rituals, this day too has a properly defined procedure which most individuals and families choose to follow.

Saying Goodbye to a loved one can be really tough but that doesn’t mean that this ritual has to be executed in a dull manner. Flowers are the most important part of every funeral proceeding. Not only are they a sweet element to convey your remembrance for the person who has left for their heavenly abode, but they are an omen of hope and affection that you hold for your loved one.

This post will provide you with vital funeral etiquettes that you must keep in mind before executing a funeral with your family.

The Less, the Better

Different cultures from all over the world follow a different set of practices when it comes to funeral rituals. While some religions mandatorily use flowers as an important part of their funeral rituals, other cultures either restraint the use of flowers or take decisions as per their own wishes. The first step towards choosing flowers for a ritual is to make sure that you keep it less cluttered. There is no point in choosing a mix of flowers without knowing their significance.

What does each flower stand for?

When you proceed to get flowers for placing in the casket, you must pay attention to the meaning that each type of flower portrays. Below is a list of the most common flowers that individuals prefer for a funeral and what they stand for:

Camelia

Camelia is a flower which represents Gratitude and Respect when placed over the funeral casket of the person who has passed away. Choosing Camelia is a way of thanking the person for their contributions in their entire lifetime.

Roses

There are different colors of roses that you can choose for the funeral, each one of them representing a different level of Love and Affection. While a light pink rose signifies innocence and love, red roses stand for the remembrance of a dearly loved one.

Daffodils and Daisies

An omen of eternal hope and possibilities, daffodils are known to send across hope and positive vibes to the person who has just departed for their heavenly journey. Daisies, on the other hand, signify the presence of good wishes and innocence.

Forget-me-nots

Just as the name says, Forget-me-nots depict the remembrance that you will hold in your heart forever for the person who has passed on.

Lilies

White Lilies are known to be used as funeral flowers across different religions and cultures as a symbol of perpetual peace and admiration for the one who is long gone.

Cultural Differences

It is important to note here that there are a few cultures of the world which restraint or don’t follow the practice of using flowers for a funeral. Placing funeral flowers is a practice which is not preferred to be followed when it comes to Jewish and Islam Cultures. The Indian culture, on the other hand, places a strong emphasis on the usage of flowers, preferably roses which are laid upon the funeral bed.

Different types of funeral flower Arrangements

Depending upon the length of your casket and the wishes of the family, these are the different kinds of flower arrangements that you must know about, before proceeding for the funeral arrangements.

Wreaths

A wreath is a circular shaped floral arrangement which is covered by a bunch of flowers and leaves woven together and held tightly. A wreath is usually made up of different combinations of flowers along with leaves.

Freshly Cut flowers

If you wish to bid Adieu in the simplest and the most beautiful way possible, then you can choose to pay homage with a bunch of raw flowers which can be combined together and placed near the casket.

Floral Casket Tops

This arrangement permits you to adorn the topmost part of your casket with flowers that you choose to put.

Inside the Casket

Placing flowers inside the casket gives your beloved one a floral bed to lay themselves on for the rest of eternity. This arrangement usually requires the accumulation of flower petals or soft flowers which are laid inside the casket.

Complete Article HERE!

How the Death Positive Movement Is Coming to Life

From joining coffin clubs to downloading apps like WeCroak, here’s how a growing number of people are living their best life by embracing death.

Are you ready to join the death positive movement?

by Stephanie Booth

Taking a dirt nap. Biting the big one. Gone — forever.

Given the gloom and painful finality with which we speak about death, it’s no wonder that 56.4 percent of Americans are “afraid” or “very afraid” of the people they love dying, according to a Chapman University study.

The cultural mindset is that it’s something terrible to be avoided — even though it happens to all of us.

But in recent years, people from all walks of life have begun to publicly push back against that oxymoronic idea.

It’s called the death positive movement, and the goal isn’t to make death obsolete. This way of thinking simply argues that “cultural censorship” of death isn’t doing us any favors. In fact, it’s cutting into the valuable time we have while we’re still alive.

What does that look like, exactly?

This rebranding of death includes end-of-life doulas, death cafes (casual get-togethers where people chat about dying), funeral homes that let you dress your loved one’s body for their cremation or be present for it.

There’s even the WeCroak app, which delivers five death-relevant quotes to your phone each day. (“Don’t forget,” a screen reminder will gently nudge, “you’re going to die.”)

Yet despite its name, the death positive movement isn’t a yellow smiley face–substitute for grief.

Instead, “it’s a way of moving toward neutral acceptance of death and embracing values which make us more conscious of our day-to-day living,” explained Robert Neimeyer, PhD, director of the Portland Institute for Loss and Transition, which offers training and certification in grief therapy.

Death as a positive mindset

Although it’s hard to imagine, what with our 24-hour news cycle that feeds on fatalities, death hasn’t always been such a terrifying prospect.

Well, at least early death was more commonplace.

Back in 1880, the average American was only expected to live to see their 39th birthday. But “as medicine has advanced, so has death become more remote,” explained Ralph White.

White is the co-founder of the the New York Open Center, an inspired learning center that launched the Art of Dying Institute. This is an initiative with a mission to reshape the understanding of death.

Studies show that 80 percent of Americans would prefer to take their last breath at home, yet only 20 percent do. Sixty percent die in hospitals, while 20 percent live their last days in nursing homes.

“Doctors are trained to experience the death of their patients as failure, so everything is done to prolong life,” White said. “Many people use up their life savings in the last six months of their lives on ultimately futile medical interventions.”

When the institute was founded four years ago, attendees often had a professional motivation. They were hospice nurses, for instance, or cancer doctors, social workers, or chaplains. Today, participants are often just curious individuals.

“We consider this a reflection of American culture’s growing openness to addressing death and dying more candidly,” White said.

“The common thread is that they’re all willing to engage with the profound questions around dying: How do we best prepare? How can we make the experience less frightening to ourselves and others? What might we expect if consciousness continues after death? What are the most effective and compassionate ways of working with the dying and their families?”

“The death of another can often crack us open and reveal aspects of ourselves that we don’t always want to see, acknowledge, or feel,” added Tisha Ford, manager of institutes and long-term trainings for the NY Open Center.

“The more we deny death’s existence, the easier it is to keep those parts of ourselves neatly tucked away.”

Death as a community builder

In 2010, Katie Williams, a former palliative care nurse, was attending a meeting for lifelong learners in her hometown of Rotorua, New Zealand, when the leader asked if anyone had new ideas for clubs. Williams did. She suggested she could build her own coffin.

“It was a shot from somewhere and totally not a considered idea,” said Williams, now 80. “There was no forward planning and little skill background.”

And yet, her Coffin Club generated massive interest.

Williams called up friends between the ages of 70 and 90 with carpentry or design skills she thought could be useful. With the help of a local funeral director, they began building and decorating coffins in William’s garage.

“Most found the idea appealing and the creativity exciting,” said Williams. “It was an incredible social time, and many found the friendships they made very valuable.”

Pearl, a New Zealand Coffin Club member, poses with her pet chicken in her decorated coffin.

Nine years later, although they’ve since moved to a larger facility, Williams and her Coffin Club members still meet every Wednesday afternoon.

Children and grandchildren often come too.

“We think it’s important that the young family members come [to] help them to normalize the fact that people die,” explained Williams. “There’s been so much ‘head in the sand’ thinking involved with death and dying.”

Younger adults have shown up to make coffins for terminally ill parents or grandparents. So have families or close friends experiencing a death.

“There’s lots of crying, laughing, love and sadness, but it has been very therapeutic as all ages are involved,” said Williams.

There are now multiple Coffin Clubs across New Zealand, as well as other parts of the world, including the United States. But it’s less about the final product and more about the company, Williams pointed out.

“It gives [people] the opportunity to voice concerns, get advice, tell stories and mingle in a free, open way,” said Williams. “To many who come, it’s an outing each week that they cherish.”

Death as a life changer

Janie Rakow, an end-of-life doula, hasn’t just changed her life because of death. She helps others do the same.

A corporate accountant for 20 years, Rakow still vividly remembers being mid-workout at a gym when planes struck the World Trade Towers on September 11, 2001.

“I remember saying to myself, ‘Life can change in one second,’” said the Paramus, New Jersey, resident. “That day, I wanted to change my life.”

Rakow quit her job and started volunteering at a local hospice, offering emotional and spiritual support to patients and their families. The experience profoundly changed her.

“People say, ‘Oh my gosh, it must be so depressing,’ but it’s just the opposite,” Rakow said.

Rakow trained to become an end-of-life doula and co-founded the International End of Life Doula Association (INELDA) in 2015. Since then, the group has trained over 2,000 people. A recent program in Portland, Oregon, sold out.

During a person’s last days of life, end-of-life doulas fill a gap that hospice workers simply don’t have the time for. Besides assisting with physical needs, doulas help clients explore meaning in their life and create a lasting legacy. That can mean compiling favorite recipes into a book for family members, writing letters to an unborn grandchild, or helping to clear the air with a loved one.

Sometimes, it’s simply sitting down and asking, “So, what was your life like?”

“We’ve all touched other people’s lives,” said Rakow. “Just by talking to someone, we can uncover the little threads that run through and connect.”

Doulas can also help create a “vigil plan” — a blueprint of what the dying person would like their death to look like, whether at home or in hospice. It can include what music to play, readings to be shared aloud, even what a dying space may look like.

End-of-life doulas explain signs of the dying process to family and friends, and afterward the doulas stick around to help them process the range of emotions they’re feeling.

If you’re thinking it’s not so far removed from what a birth doula does, you’d be correct.

“It’s a big misconception that death is so scary,” said Rakow. “99 percent of the deaths I’ve witnessed are calm and peaceful. It can be a beautiful experience. People need to be open to that.”

Complete Article HERE!

Will Machines Be Able to Tell When Patients Are About to Die?

The doctor-patient relationship—the heart of medicine—is broken: Doctors are too distracted and overwhelmed to truly connect with their patients, and medical errors and misdiagnoses abound. In Deep Medicine, physician Eric Topol reveals how artificial intelligence can help.

By

A few years ago, on a warm sunny afternoon, my 90-year-old father-in-law was sweeping his patio when he suddenly felt weak and dizzy. Falling to his knees, he crawled inside his condo and onto the couch. He was shaking but not confused when my wife, Susan, came over minutes later, since we lived just a block away. She texted me at work, where I was just finishing my clinic, and asked me to come over.

When I got there, he was weak and couldn’t stand up on his own, and it was unclear what had caused this spell. A rudimentary neuro exam didn’t show anything: his speech and vision were fine; muscle and sensory functions were all OK save for some muscle trembling. A smartphone cardiogram and echo were both normal. Even though I knew it wouldn’t go over too well, I suggested we take him to the emergency room to find out what the problem was.

John, a Purple Heart–decorated World War II vet, had never been sick. Only in recent months had he developed some mild high blood pressure, for which his internist had prescribed chlorthalidone, a weak diuretic. Otherwise, his only medicine over the years was a preventive baby aspirin every day. With some convincing he agreed to be seen, so along with his wife and mine, we drove over to the local ER. The doctor there thought he might have had some kind of stroke, but a head CT didn’t show any abnormality. But then the bloodwork came back and showed, surprisingly, a critically low potassium level of 1.9 mEq/L—one of the lowest I’ve seen. It didn’t seem that the diuretic alone, which can cause less extreme reduction in potassium, could be the culprit. Nevertheless, John was admitted overnight just to get his potassium level restored by intravenous and oral supplement.

All was well until a couple of weeks later, when he suddenly started vomiting bright red blood. He was so unwilling to be sick that he told his wife not to call Susan. But she was panicked and called Susan anyway. Again, my wife quickly arrived on the scene. There was blood everywhere, in the bedroom, in the living room, and bathroom. Her father was fully alert despite the vomiting and a black, tarry stool, both of which were clear indications that he was having a major gastrointestinal bleed. He needed to go to the ER again. At the hospital a few hours later, after an evaluation and a consultation with a GI specialist, an urgent endoscopy showed my father-in-law had esophageal varices—a network of abnormal blood vessels—that were responsible for the bleeding.

To do the procedure of localizing the source of bleeding, John was anesthetized and given fentanyl, and when he finally got to a hospital room in the evening, he could barely say a few words. Soon thereafter he went into a deep coma. Meanwhile his labs came back: his liver function tests were markedly abnormal, and his blood ammonia level was extremely high. An ultrasound showed a cirrhotic liver. We quickly came to the realization that the esophageal varices were secondary to end-stage liver disease. A man who had been perfectly healthy for 90 years all of a sudden was in a coma with a rotted liver. He was receiving no intravenous or nutritional support, but he was receiving lactulose enemas to reduce his blood ammonia level from the liver failure. His prognosis for any meaningful recovery was nil, and the attending doctor and the medical residents suggested that we classify him as a do-not-resuscitate order.

Arrangements were made over the next few days for him to come to our house with hospice support, so he could die at home. Late on a Sunday night, the night before we were to take my father-in-law home to die, my wife and daughter went to visit him. They both had been taught “healing touch” and, as an expression of their deep love, spent a few hours talking to him and administering this spiritual treatment as he lay comatose.

On Monday morning, my wife met with the hospice nurse outside the hospital room. Susan told the nurse that, before they went over the details, she wanted to go see her father. As Susan hugged him and said, “Dad, if you can hear me, we’re taking you home today.” John’s chest heaved; he opened his eyes, looked at her, and exclaimed, “Ohhhhhhh.” She asked him if he knew who she was, and he said, “Sue.”

If there was ever a family Lazarus story, this was it. Everything was turned upside down. The plan to let him die was abandoned. When the hospice transport crew arrived, they were told the transfer plan was ditched. An IV was inserted for the first time. The rest of the family from the East Coast was alerted of his shocking conversion from death to life so that they could come to visit. The next day my wife even got a call on her cell phone from her father asking her to bring him something to eat.

My lasting memory of that time is taking John on a wheelchair ride outside. By then he’d been in the hospital for 10 days and, now attached to multiple IVs and an indwelling Foley catheter, was as pale as the sheets. Against the wishes of his nurses, I packaged him up and took him in front of the hospital on a beautiful fall afternoon. We trekked down the sidewalk and up a little hill in front of the hospital; the wind brought out the wonderful aroma of the nearby eucalyptus trees. We were talking, and we both started to cry. I think for him it was about the joy of being alive to see his family. John had been my adopted father for the past 20 years, since my father had died, and we’d been very close throughout the nearly 40 years we had known each other. I never imagined seeing him sick, since he had always been a rock. And now that he had come back to life, compos mentis, I wondered how long this would last. The end-stage liver disease didn’t make sense, since his drinking history was moderate at worst. There was a blood test that came back with antibodies to suggest the remote possibility of primary biliary cirrhosis, a rare disease that didn’t make a lot of sense to find in a now 91-year-old man (the entire family had gotten to celebrate his birthday with him in the hospital). Uncertainties abounded.

He didn’t live much longer. There was debate about going to inject and sclerose the esophageal varices to avoid a recurrent bleed, but that would require another endoscopy procedure, which nearly did him in. He was about to be discharged a week later when he did have another bleeding event and succumbed.

What does this have to do with deep changes with AI? My father-in-law’s story intersects with several issues in healthcare, all of them centering on how hospitals and patients interact.

The most obvious is how we handle the end of life. Palliative care as a field in medicine is undergoing explosive growth already. It is going to be radically reshaped: new tools are in development using the data in electronic health records to predict time to death with unprecedented accuracy while providing the doctor with a report that details the factors that led to the prediction. If further validated, this and related deep learning efforts may have an influence for palliative care teams in more than 1,700 American hospitals, about 60 percent of the total.

There are only 6,600 board certified palliative-care physicians in the United States, or only one for every 1,200 people under care, a situation that calls out for much higher efficiency without compromising care. Less than half of the patients admitted to hospitals needing palliative care actually receive it. Meanwhile, of the Americans facing end-of-life care, 80 percent would prefer to die at home, but only a small fraction get to do so—60 percent die in the hospital.

A first issue is predicting when someone might die—getting that right is critical to whether someone who wants to die at home actually can. Doctors have had a notoriously difficult time predicting the timing of death. Over the years, a screening tool called the Surprise Question has been used by doctors and nurses to identify people nearing the end of life—to use it, they reflect on their patient, asking themselves, “Would I be surprised if this patient died in the next 12 months?” A systematic review of 26 papers with predictions for over 25,000 people, showed the overall accuracy was less than 75 percent, with remarkable heterogeneity.

Anand Avati, a computer scientist at Stanford, along with his team, published a deep learning algorithm based on electronic health records to predict the timing of death. This might not have been clear from the paper’s title, “Improving Palliative Care with Deep Learning,” but make no mistake, this was a dying algorithm. There was a lot of angst about “death panels” when Sarah Palin first used the term in 2009 in a debate about federal health legislation, but that was involving doctors. Now we’re talking about machines. An 18-layer DNN learning from the electronic health records of almost 160,000 patients was able to predict the time until death on a test population of 40,000 patient records, with remarkable accuracy. The algorithm picked up predictive features that doctors wouldn’t, including the number of scans, particularly of the spine or the urinary system, which turned out to be as statistically powerful, in terms of probability, as the person’s age. The results were quite powerful: more than 90 percent of people predicted to die in the following three to twelve months did so, as was the case for the people predicted to live more than 12 months. Noteworthy, the ground truths used for the algorithm were the ultimate hard data—the actual timing of deaths for the 200,000 patients assessed. And this was accomplished with just the structured data in the electronic records, such as age, what procedures and scans were done, and length of hospitalization. The algorithm did not use the results of lab assays, pathology reports, or scan results, not to mention more holistic descriptors of individual patients, including psychological status, will to live, gait, hand strength, or many other parameters that have been associated with life span. Imagine the increase in accuracy if they had—it would have been taken up several notches.

An AI dying algorithm portends major changes for the field of palliative care, and there are companies pursuing this goal of predicting the timing of mortality, like CareSkore, but predicting whether someone will die while in a hospital is just one dimension of what neural networks can predict from the data in a health system’s electronic records. A team at Google, in collaboration with three academic medical centers, used input from more than 216,000 hospitalizations of 114,000 patients and nearly 47 billion data points to do a lot of DNN predicting: whether a patient would die, length of stay, unexpected hospital readmission, and final discharge diagnoses were all predicted with a range of accuracy that was good and quite consistent among the hospitals that were studied. A German group used deep learning in more than 44,000 patients to predict hospital death, kidney failure, and bleeding complications after surgery with remarkable accuracy.

DeepMind AI is working with the US Department of Veterans Affairs to predict medical outcomes of over 700,000 veterans. AI has also been used to predict whether a patient will survive after a heart transplant and to facilitate a genetic diagnosis by combining electronic health records and sequence data. Mathematical modeling and logistic regression have been applied to such outcome data in the past, of course, but the use of machine and deep learning, along with much larger datasets, has led to improved accuracy.

The implications are broad. As noted physician-author Siddhartha Mukherjee reflected, “I cannot shake some inherent discomfort with the thought that an algorithm might understand patterns of mortality better than most humans.” Clearly, algorithms can help patients and their doctors make decisions about the course of care both in palliative situations and those where recovery is the goal. They can influence resource utilization for health systems, such as intensive care units, resuscitation, or ventilators. Likewise, the use of such prediction data by health insurance companies for reimbursement hangs out there as a looming concern.

Going back to my father-in-law’s case, his severe liver disease, which was completely missed, might have been predicted by his lab tests, performed during his first hospitalization, which showed a critically low potassium level. AI algorithms might have even been able to identify the underlying cause, which remains elusive to this day. My father-in-law’s end-of-life story also brings up many elements that will never be captured by an algorithm. Based on his labs, liver failure, age, and unresponsiveness, his doctors said he would never wake up and was likely to die within a few days. A predictive algorithm would have ultimately been correct that my father-in-law would not survive his hospital stay.

But that doesn’t tell us everything about what we should do during the time in which my father-in-law, or any patient, would still live. When we think of human life-and-death matters, it is hard to interject machines and algorithms—indeed, it is not enough. Despite the doctors’ prediction, he came back to life and was able to celebrate his birthday with his extended family, sharing reminiscences, laughter, and affection. I have no idea whether human healing touch was a feature in his resurrection, but my wife and daughter certainly have their views on its effect. But abandoning any efforts to sustain his life at that point would have preempted the chance for him to see, say good-bye to, and express his deep love for his family. We don’t have an algorithm to say whether that’s meaningful.

Complete Article HERE!

Music therapy ministers to patient needs in ‘winter of life’

In this Feb. 4, 2019 photo, Donald Granstaff, 92, sings Louis Armstrong’s “On the Sunny Side of the Street” at his Princeton, Ky., home with board certified music therapist Kenna Hudgins, a contractor with Pennyroyal Hospice. Hudgins designs Donald’s weekly music therapy sessions to help decrease any feelings of isolation.

By MICHELE VOWELL

“At 92 years old, I finally learned to do as I’m told,

The sun comes up, the sun goes down,

The earth keeps goin’ ’round and ’round.

I’m content where I am.

In the winter of life, I do the best that I can.”

Princeton resident Donald Granstaff spends much of his time these days looking back on his life.

The 92-year-old husband, father, Navy veteran, musician, preacher and missionary served his country and God for decades around the globe. Today, Donald often reflects on those times from his bedroom while under the care of Pennyroyal Hospice.

“I was thinking the last few days, what have I accomplished?” he said Monday afternoon. “Around the world twice. Haiti and the West Indies — all that. And all I can come up with is the guys that I prayed with and I lead them to the Lord. And, I suppose that’s what it’s all about.”

To help Donald face the winter of his life, Kenna Hudgins, board certified music therapist, brings her keyboard, drums, guitar and even a tambourine, weekly to share an hour of tunes with the elderly patient at his home. Hudgins and Donald sing familiar songs and play the instruments together in an effort to make his transition easier.

“The main goal I initially assessed (for Donald) was for anticipatory grief — to work through the acceptance of the fact that we are terminal and now on hospice (care),” she said. “He’s very aware, so day after day just knowing that it’s coming and there will be changes and decline. Life is hard. Music therapy offers a way to process that musically.”

Music therapy

“Anyone who responds to music can benefit from music therapy, especially in hospice,” Hudgins said. “Music plays a role in all of our lives. It always has. It’s why we can watch a movie and feel scared, feel love or feel emotion. Music causes neurologic response — it affects our whole brain — in multiple areas simultaneously. Because of that, music therapy is not about being a musician. It’s not about understanding music. It’s about just responding.”

Hudgins, who is a contractor with Pennyroyal Hospice, uses her skills as a board certified music therapist to address the needs of patients in Christian, Todd, Trigg, Lyon and Caldwell counties in western Kentucky.

“Hospice is very grounding,” Hudgins said. “Every day that you go into somebody’s house and they’re dealing with their struggles, it brings you back to true purposes — day-to-day tasks and stresses don’t matter as much because life is short. Personally, it’s just a very rewarding field.”

Communicating with hospice social workers, Hudgins identifies patients who may benefit from music therapy. She asks family members for 10 minutes of their time to visit their loved one and share a song or two with them to assess his or her responses.

“I don’t usually talk much about it, I just let them experience it,” she said, smiling. “I’ve never been told not to come back and it’s never just 10 minutes.”

Hudgins said everyone has memories associated with certain music.

“A therapist’s job is to find that music that is significant to that person,” she said.

Working with some patients can be difficult, Hudgins said, because of the emotions tied to facing the end of life, but sharing music with them is rewarding.

“Music is so joyful,” she said. “When I get to bring joy to a family and a loved one … that’s not a sad job. … I’m really blessed to just be a part of their lives. To bring joy is just huge.”

Music with Donald

After working with Donald for several weeks, Hudgins said her therapy goals for him shifted to decreasing his feelings of isolation.

“I try to get as much participation from him physically, whether that’s playing the keyboard or drumming,” she said. “As his hands might get more stiff, clapping — anything to get his body engaged. If his body is unable, then just getting him to verbally participate. That, in and of itself, will decrease isolation.”

In Monday’s music therapy session, Hudgins wanted Donald to sing some love songs with her while playing instruments.

“With Valentine’s day coming up next week, we’re going to do sweetheart songs,” she said.

“The old sweetheart songs,” Donald said. “That’s the best kind, the old ones.”

The duo harmonized to Bing Crosby’s “Let Me Call You Sweetheart” as Hudgins played the keyboard.

“Let me call you sweetheart

I’m in love with you

Let me hear you whisper

That you love me too …”

In the middle of the song, Don stopped singing to share a childhood memory.

“I used to hear my dad sing that one all the time,” Donald said.

“Yeah? Did he sing it to your mom?” Hudgins said.

“Yeah. He worked in vaudeville for a long time,” he said. “He played mandolin and violin, and he sang all the time. He loved to sing.”

“Good memories,” Hudgins said.

Donald married his own sweetheart Betty 68 years ago. They exchanged vows on June 16, 1950.

“It was my birthday,” he said.

In the living room, Betty sat on the couch quietly listening to her husband sing and play music with Hudgins. She said music therapy is a comfort to her and Donald, who played several instruments, including the organ, keyboard and drums since he was a boy.

“I love that he’s even trying,” she said after the session. “I think this is a good thing for him because he was a musician. It meant so much to his heart. That was his life.”

Back in his bedroom, a second song, Frank Sinatra’s “My Funny Valentine,” also sparked Donald’s memories of his father.

“That’s a good song,” he said. “He used to sing songs like it.”

“I’m glad I’m making you think about your dad. I haven’t heard you talk a lot about him,” Hudgins said.

“He was quite a man. Yeah boy! He was something else,” Donald said, remembering times they would go fishing together at Lake Barkley. “He owned a couple of boats. Nice, big boats. And I used to go with him on the boats.”

Midway through the hour, Hudgins sang the chorus to a song about Donald’s life they wrote together after three or four music therapy sessions.

“I am a husband, a father, a preacher, a teacher

A born-again, saved-by-grace man …”

“When I came out of college, I was a really smooth character,” Donald said, listening to the lyrics. “I was fast and furious, and I didn’t stay that way very long. I was saved in June 1959, and before that I was a ‘religious’ human being …”

Early in their marriage, Donald and Betty took their five children to the mission field in the British Isles of the Caribbean and later in Haiti. Donald also helped another missionary build a radio station in Dominica. When they moved back to the U.S., he pastored a few churches in McMinnville, Tennessee, and Princeton. For a time, he often played the organ in the Barkley Lodge dining room.

“He was a musician from the time he was little,” Betty said. “Every church we were a part of he would play the organ until he wasn’t able to physically.”

Now, Betty said, some days can be difficult.

“Sometimes I have an overwhelming sadness. It’s hard to see him not be able to do anything,” Betty said, crying. “God love him, he never complains. Never, ever complains about anything. He’s just always up and very sweet. He’s still a testimony to everybody that visits him because of his attitude.”

Happy Trails

To close out Monday’s music therapy session, Donald and Hudgins sang the Roy Rogers and Dale Evans classic, “Happy Trails.”

“Who cares about the clouds when we’re together?

Just sing a song, and bring the sunny weather.

Happy trails to you,

Until we meet again.”

“I think it’s good. It can help lift you up,” Donald said of music therapy with Hudgins. “I’m not like some guys. Some guys get tired of it, throw their hands up and leave. I’ll try.”

Hudgins said Donald “still has a lot of life in him.”

“Whether (the patient) is a musician or not, music is a way to connect with the outside world. It can pull you into different areas of your own life, make you feel alive again,” she said.

Part of Donald’s legacy will be the song he and Hudgins wrote together.

“We have created a tangible song that he can leave for his family,” she said. “His family are musicians so they can actually play that song and play it with him.”

The chorus is:

“I am a husband, a father, a teacher, a preacher

A born-again, saved-by-grace man.

I’m a musician, woodworker, a servant, missionary

But most of all I’m just a good ole boy from Kentucky.”

Donald and Hudgins plan to meet next week for music therapy.

“Every one of us has had music in our lives that has impacted us,” Hudgins said. “It’s my job to figure out what is going to impact someone at the end of their life for the best end-of-life experience possible.”

Complete Article HERE!

Shaina Garfield redesigns death with eco-friendly macramé coffin

LEAVES from Shaina Garfield on Vimeo.

By kieron marchese 

soon after shaina garfield realised her vision for an eco-friendly coffinshe noticed that what she had actually made was a coffin for herself. after being diagnosed with chronic lyme disease four years ago, the prospect of death caused a preoccupation that would eventually inspire her work as an industrial designer. as she tackled the prospect of dying, she discovered an interesting contradiction between something that essentially brings people closer to earth, and the harmful impact death practices have on the planet. after a closer look, traditional burials, embalming and cremation, all involved the pollution of nasty chemicals and toxins.

shaina garfield spoke at design indaba 2019, a three-day conference bringing together the world’s leading creatives to share their work

speaking at design indaba 2019 shaina notes that we’ve become so far removed from nature as a result of human exceptionalism – the belief that humans are the most important entities in the universe. so she came up with ‘LEAVES’, a textile coffin built from sustainable materials, that hopes to bring us closer to the planet that we live on.

LEAVES is a textile coffin built from sustainable materials

composed of a netting that wraps around the deceased, LEAVES works to make the burial process a much greener ritual. the design uses rope which has been treated with a dye and embedded with spores, encouraging fungus growth that speeds up decomposition and eats any toxins in the body. a tree is then planted on the burial site, making the most of this nutrient rich soil. instead of cemeteries, shaina imagines luscious areas where nature is representative of the greater purpose our bodies can have.

as much as it lessons the impact humans make on the planet, LEAVES also promotes positive discussions around death. drawing from funeral practices around the world, shaina considered ways in which her designs could help to support people with their grief. she imagines those mourning the death of someone coming together to tie the knots necessary to make the coffin, a meditative experience that intends to help with emotional healing.

those mourning the death of someone can come together to tie the knots necessary to make the coffin

shaina describes herself as an advocate celebrating people and the earth‘, and it’s this relationship that forms the basis of her work. in a powerful description she exposes the reality that at death we are actively disconnected from nature. we choose at all costs to ‘keep ourselves in a domestic dream‘ and in the process, our consideration for the planet is nil. the natural resources it takes to make coffins, the toxins that are emitted into the air during cremation, and the chemicals seeping out of graveyards because of embalming, are all cause to believe that our attitudes towards death and the planet we live on are wrong.

the design uses rope which has been treated with a dye and embedded with spores
fungus growth that speeds up decomposition and eats any toxins in the body
shaina describes herself as an ‘advocate celebrating people and the earth‘
shaina imagines luscious areas where nature is representative of the greater purpose our bodies can have.

Complete Article HERE!

A doctor in California used a video-link robot to tell a patient he was going to die.

The man’s family is upset

By Dakin Andone and Artemis Moshtaghian

Preparing for the death of a loved one is difficult no matter the circumstances.

But Annalisia Wilharm said she never expected a doctor would deliver the bad news about her grandfather via a video screen on a robot.

Wilharm was sitting by her grandfather’s bedside in the ICU of the Kaiser Permanente Medical Center in Fremont, California, last Monday night when the machine rolled into their room and a doctor, appearing via live video link, offered his grim prognosis. Her grandfather Ernest Quintana, 78, died the next day.

“I think they should have had more dignity and treated him better than they did,” Wilharm told CNN. “No granddaughter, no family member should have to go through what I just did with him.”

Wilharm told CNN her family knew that her grandfather would die soon. But they’re angered by the way the situation was handled and how the news was delivered. She said she and her family hope no one else receives the same treatment.

Ernest Quintana died after being told by a doctor who visited him via robot that there were no more treatment options left.

“I was so scared for him and disappointed with the delivery,” Wilharm said, choking up. “And I could tell by the look on his face what that did to him.”

A spokeswoman for the hospital offered “sincere condolences to the family” in a statement sent to CNN.
“We take this very seriously and have reached out to the family to discuss their concerns,” said Michelle Gaskill-Hames, a senior vice president and area manager of Kaiser Permanente Greater Southern Alameda County.

“Our physicians and nurses were in regular, in-person communication with the patient and family about his condition from the moment he entered our hospital,” she added. “The evening video tele-visit was a follow-up to earlier physician visits — it did not replace previous conversations with patient and family members and was not used in the delivery of the initial diagnosis.”

For years, Quintana had lived with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, a progressive lung disease that make makes it hard to breathe. It includes emphysema and chronic bronchitis.

Last Monday, doctors at the hospital conducted tests to assess the state of Quintana’s lungs. That evening, Wilharm told her mother and grandmother — Quintana’s wife of 58 years — that the pair should go home and get some rest.
Soon after a robot with a video screen came into the room, accompanied by a nurse who remained silent. A doctor on the screen began speaking to them.

Wilharm said she had no idea who the doctor was or where he was located.

She filmed the interaction on her phone as the doctor relayed the results of her grandfather’s tests.
In the footage viewed by CNN, the doctor on the screen tells Quintana, “Unfortunately there’s nothing we can treat very effectively.”

The doctor explains they can give Quintana morphine to make him more comfortable, but that would make breathing more difficult.

Wilharm then tells her grandfather the doctor is recommending hospice care at home.

“You know, I don’t know if he’s going to get home,” the doctor says, adding that the best treatment plan at that point was to begin focusing on Quintana’s comfort.

Wilharm told CNN that at that point she had to call her mother and grandmother so they could get back to the hospital.

“It didn’t matter (to the hospital) that his wife of 58 years wasn’t there for that,” she said.

Wilharm told CNN that her family was under no illusions about her grandfather’s condition.
“We knew that we were going to lose him,” Wilharm told CNN in a phone interview Saturday. “Our point is the delivery (of the news). There was no compassion.”

When her grandmother returned to the hospital, she asked the nurses about the robot. According to Wilharm, they explained the hospital was small and the robot was used to make rounds at night.

Gaskill-Hames, the hospital spokeswoman, said the health care provider is “continuously learning how best to integrate technology into patient interactions.”

“In every aspect of our care, and especially when communicating difficult information, we do so with compassion in a personal manner,” she said, adding that the term “robot” is “inaccurate and inappropriate.”

“This secure video technology is a live conversation with a physician using tele-video technology, and always with a nurse or other physician in the room to explain the purpose and function of the technology,” Gaskill-Hames added. It “allows a small hospital to have additional specialists such as a board-certified critical care physician available 24/7, enhancing the care provided and bringing additional consultative expertise to the bedside.”

Wilharm told CNN that a doctor had visited Quintana in person earlier in the day.

Wilharm said the in-person doctor was “very sweet” and held her grandfather’s hand as she spoke with him about hospice care and his options.

Gaskill-Hames said the hospital does not encourage the use of technology to replace personal interactions between patients and health care workers.

“We understand how important this is for all concerned, and regret that we fell short of the family’s expectations,” she said.

Wilharm agrees.

“That was one of the worst days of my life,” she said.

Complete Article HERE!