— Five ways nature can help us through grief
How can nature comfort us while we’re grieving? From refocusing our minds to showing us how to carry on, here are five ways that nature can help.
By Paddy Wilson
There are many ways people try to process and manage their grief, from talking with people close to them, to writing about their loss.
For others, immersing themselves in nature helps. But can taking a walk in a forest, going for a swim or setting out into the wilderness really help people work through their loss?
In a talk for Marie Curie, the Healing Power of Nature in Grief, TV presenter and survival instructor Ray Mears, author Raynor Winn and filmmaker Cat White shared their experiences of how nature provided them with comfort through grief – and how others might find comfort in it too.
1. Refocus and release
Most simply, nature can help people to take their mind off grief. When wild swimming, for example, “the shock to your system of cold water… you’re so cold that there’s nowhere else your brain can be at that moment in time,” says Cat, whose short film, Fifty-Four Days, reflected her real-life experience of daily swimming to process her grief.
And refocusing your attention on nature can also provide a sense of release. “When families go on journeys into wild places, it gives them a sort of release from the normal complexities of life,” says Ray.
“Even families with difficult relationships can be moved by being in a wild place where nature takes a hand in the events of the day. Time out from normal life can be very, very healing.”
2. A comforting sense of smallness
For many, grief can feel insurmountable. But nature’s vastness can provide an antidote. As Ray explains, in nature – particularly in wilder spaces – “you’re constantly reminded you aren’t the dominant force in that landscape.”
“I like to go to a very big wilderness and big forests where you feel absolutely tiny,” says Ray. Getting face-to-face with the scale of the natural world can be comforting because, as Raynor suggests, “nature puts things into perspective.” While this perspective won’t end our grief, it might help us manage it.
3. The importance of specific places
While the vastness of nature can help, finding specific meaningful places in nature can provide comfort too. For Ray, who spent time outdoors with people close to him who’ve died, “to be outdoors is to be forever reminded of them”.
Particular places can conjure specific memories and feelings. Ray suggests caution therefore, and a mindfulness to look after yourself when you’re grieving, because “unless you’re in the right frame of mind, it’s not easy to go there because the feeling is so profound”.
“But at the same time, it’s also warming. Those places and landscapes can be places to visit if you wish to visit those memories.”
4. Sharing in nature and grief
Like grief, nature belongs to everyone but is experienced individually. In the same way we share in nature – treading paths trodden before, swimming in lakes already swam in – sharing with others who are going through similar feelings can be helpful.
As Raynor explains, “Sometimes it’s enough to know that that place and feeling you’re inhabiting right now, you’re not alone because everyone who’s passed over that path has felt some element of what you’re feeling. There’s a sense of community within your isolation.”
As with grief, “anyone who spends time in nature… shares some sort of connection of knowing that they belong to something bigger and that you’re part of something with them”.
5. Nature’s endurance
Ultimately, grief is something we all experience. It’s a fact of life that people close to us will die. But nature’s longevity offers a different feeling: a sense of endurance. “Nature carries on when we think we can’t,” says Raynor. “If you allow yourself to experience that continuity of nature, it allows you to feel that’s possible within yourself.”
Its sense of endurance doesn’t mock our mortality; it helps us understand that we can carry on. As Cat explains, “Dawn will always come again. However overwhelmed we feel, nature has the possibility to remind us there will be another day and a sense of keeping going.”
Proximity, not prescription
Whether trekking through a forest or taking a stroll in a park, getting out in nature is one of the most straightforward strategies to help with bereavement. “It’s so accessible. And you don’t need a prescription,” says Ray, to walk through a park or go for a forest trek.
“You don’t need anything,” adds Cat. “It’s so easy. You need proximity – but that’s all you need.”
There are lots of ways you can get support when someone dies, from embracing nature to talking to someone.
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